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Nov 13, 2013 0

A Nintendo Direct Presentation Recap (11.13.13) Some New Trailers and Nintendo FINALLY Unifies 3DS and Wii U eShop Accounts!

Haha. Yeah No, Not Really.

Today’s peek at upcoming software for Nintendo’s systems leans heavily on the 3DS side, but that’s ok right? I mean, only one major software title for their struggling home console is more than enough to satisfy gamers throughout the Holiday Season don’t you think? And no I’m not counting Wii Fit U or the Wii Sports Club downloads as significant Wii U releases because no one wants those. It’s clear that Nintendo is relying on a wide variety of fancy bundles along with Super Mario 3D World to deliver in the living room while their 3DS portable is overflowing with high quality gaming options! *sigh*

Let’s just get to it: Here are today’s highlights to spare you having to sit through Bill Trinens’ bland cracker-ass.
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Sep 18, 2013 0

Today’s Nintendo Direct Reveals A Confusing as Shit Payment Method For the Upcoming Wii Sports CLUB.

While most of the video is spent listening to Satoru’s broken Engrish trying to describe the new features of Wii U Fit (a game that no one will buy this holiday 2013), toward the end there’s a nifty unveiling of an all-new installment in the Wii Sports series. As you can see by the screenshot above, this aint your little sister’s Wii Sports as the graphics have been given a massive overhaul including all new…uh…wait. It looks exactly the same. Well, I guess nobody really played the original for the visuals so what’s new that we have to look forward to? Honestly, the main difference is that each sport will be sold separately in the Wii U’s eShop beginning November 7th. Tennis and Bowling will be the first two available and it sounds like the games will in fact be digital only. Wii Motion Plus is required and apparently you can go online and join “Clubs” to compete with regional or worldwide opponents. This is actually a very nice feature and one to be excited about since the internet didn’t exist back when the Wii launched in 2006. The price point is a bit weird though as it’s being broken up into day passes or a one time only payment to purchase the game forever. Is that right? I’ve watched this thing a couple times already and still don’t quite get it. Have a look for yourself:
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Apr 17, 2013 0

Great Work Boys, However You Skipped Over One VERY Important Detail:

Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island Part 3 is headed to the 3DS! Y’know, the series that began with the stone cold classic SNES original, had a sub-par “spiritual” successor on the Nintendo 64 and an even more disappointing official follow up for the DS? The games that allow you to control a sweet little Yoshi as he protects a loudmouth baby Mario through levels that look like they were drawn by an 8 year old…



*tap tap tap*

Is this thing on?
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Jan 23, 2013 2

An In-Depth Look at the Nintendo Direct Presentation (1.23.13) or: MY GOD THE WIND WAKER IN HD IS ON THE WAY.

Let it be known henceforth from this day forward across our land and all territories beyond her borders what a flat out badass presentation that was this morning. Like a lot of Nintendo fans, I was hoping for a few surprises here and there but WOW. I really wasn’t prepared for Iwata to just let it all hang out like that. For those of you who went into the show with lowered expectations, have fun wiping those chunks of brain off your bedroom wall. There’s a lot to get to today so let’s just hop right in shall we?
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Jan 9, 2013 5

Hey somebody should write a Pokémon article because Nintendo just announced the next games

To: Nintendorks Staff
From: ANC

Subject: Hey somebody should write a Pokémon article because Nintendo just announced the next games

Hey all, Nintendo did yet another Nintendo Direct this morning about Pokémon, specifically to announce Pokémon X and Y, the next main games in the series, are coming out for the 3DS in October of this year. Not only that, but they’re coming out pretty much simultaneously in the major regions (désolé, Quebec) instead of six months to a year after Japanese players are already bored of it. That’s kind of a big deal, especially since online global battling and trading has been A Thing in the series since Diamond and Pearl came out in 2006. The graphics have received the most significant overhaul in the main series since Gold and Silver added color, so a bunch of screenshots and a link to the trailer would probably be good to put in the article. Maybe some images of the new starters and the version legendaries (Unown no longer has the monopoly on looking like Roman alphabet characters it seems). Maybe throw in some jokes, too, I dunno. Bag on French Canadians, they’re always fun to laugh at.

Kevin, you like Pokémon, right? Here, use these media in the article.

Dec 4, 2012 2

Nintendo Direct: December 5th @ 9 AM PST

As announced on Twitter, a new Nintendo Direct is happening tomorrow morning, or afternoon for those of you a ways east of the Mississippi. The focus will be previously announced upcoming Wii U and 3DS games, which is a shame since the world is about to end. Maybe we’ll find out when exactly Pikmin 3 and Luigi’s Mansion 2: Electric BOO!-galoo are arriving. I bet it will be a Sunday.

This post will be updated after the show. It won’t be funny, however. I am sorry. Updated with the video and a list of the games featured below. SECOND UPDATE: Now with highlights (for children).

Click here for Nintendo execs poking fun and also some games

Nov 28, 2012 3

300 billion coins collected in New Super Mario Bros. 2; New free DLC to celebrate!

Continuing their recent habit of metaphorically jumping out of the bushes behind everyone, Nintendo put out a new Nintendo Direct Mini yesterday without any warning. Thankfully, nobody died, but wait, it gets even better. In the video, Nintendo Co., Ltd. President Satoru Iwata reminds 3DS owners that he’s been spying on them while they play games, and reveals that worldwide over 300 gold bullion billion gold coins have been collected in New Super Mario Bros. 2. Iwata goes on to state that in honor of this accomplishment Nintendo has put out Coin Rush Course Pack #6- Gold Classics Pack, and is making the downloadable content available for free from now until the end of January next year. On February 1st it will remain available, but at a cost of $2.50. The levels are fashioned after familiar stages from the original Super Mario Bros. and Super Mario Bros. 3, which Iwata states is due to fan feedback and popular demand, once again reminding everyone that he’s spying on them. Creepy x 3, Iwata.

Click here for the video, featuring a guy saying “Bros.” as “bros” instead of “brothers,” and picture me getting irrationally angry at that.

nintendo direct banner
Oct 25, 2012 1

By the time you read this a new Nintendo Direct will have already happened [UPDATE]

… and I’m not just saying that just because I’m lazy and posting this late at night. Once again Nintendo has announced a special Nintendo Direct broadcast the day before it happens. The broadcast will begin at 7 A.M. PDT, too damn early for me, but you East Coast people will have a chance to grab breakfast and do the crossword puzzle first. The conference will focus on upcoming Nintendo 3DS games, which means there’s a chance of Scott “The” Moffitt being the host of the presentation. All you Moffitteers out there better jump in your jammies and hurry off to bed or you’ll miss your chance at seeing him LIVE (that’s with a long “I” sound)! When the alarm clock goes off just browse on over to Nintendo’s website or click that link to go right to the Nintendo Direct page.

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